To Wear the Hajab or Not?
Posted by Kaleidoscope on February 9, 2008
Author: Hadija Copyright © 2008
Location: Kuwait
When I first came to Kuwait, I was approached many times, and was asked the same question, over and over: “When do you think you will wear the hajab?” My reply was always the same: “I will wear the hajab when Allah gives me a sign to wear it.”
I didn’t want to make the same mistake that many women have made in the past. They were forced to wear it by their parents or husbands and not because it was ordained by Allah, and eventually, they would remove it, or be so miserable that they wouldn’t wear it in the correct manner. I finally wore the hajab, six years later. I can say, with confidence, that I put it on for all the right reasons. And I did get a sign from Allah, to wear the hajab. A strong, overwhelming feeling consumed me. The more I fought this feeling, the stronger it became.
I knew it was time to cover. So, I discussed it with my sister-in-law and asked her to show me how to wear it correctly. And when I put it on, it felt so natural. It has been four years since I began wearing the hajab, and it still feels comfortable. It is a part of me. And I am so glad that I waited until the right time.
This is my story, and I am not implying that all women should wait until they get a sign from Allah, before they cover their heads. This decision is between you, your family and Allah. But, I will add a comment or two. I have heard many people say to their daughters, “You are a Muslim and it is your duty to wear the hajab. You must cover yourself from the eyes of strangers because it is a big sin if you do not perform this duty.” Well, let me say to those who seem to be so concerned about the woman’s head being covered, but not so concerned about the other Islamic duties. Does the hajab prevent the woman and her children from being physically and verbally abused by her husband? Does the hajab prevent people (men and women) from performing charity? Does the hajab prevent maids, drivers and servants from being abused? And what about the unpaid wages of these employees and other low wage earners here in Kuwait, who are striking just to get what is owed to them? And do the greedy and selfish people, who are hoarding their money and failing to spend on their family, think that the hajab will save them from Allah’s punishment? And I can go on and on, but I think you get the idea.
As Muslims, we have many duties and responsibilities, and wearing the hajab is only a part of these duties. There are many women in Kuwait who do not wear the hajab, but they are decent women who perform their Islamic duties. And there are some women who do wear the hajab, but do not perform their duties in the correct manner, or at all. So, which one of these groups is performing the duties in the correct manner? If the hajab is the only thing that will save the Muslim from Allah’s punishment, maybe men should be wearing it, as well. It is not correct to assume that an uncovered woman is indecent, and that a covered woman is. Allah is the judge of all of us, and he knows all, hears all, and sees all. Whether you wear the hajab or not has no relevance to how well an individual performs his or her Islamic duties. As for myself, I know that I am not perfect, but I am comfortable in what I am doing.
Judy Abbott said
Interesting story ..
I’ve been wanting to wear the hijab for ages now – 7 years. I still didn’t do it.
For some reason when I’m out of Kuwait i can put it on easily, but when I’m in Kuwait i don’t even want to have long sleeves on, even if its 5 Celsius degrees.
TO tell you the truth i never heard of not wearing the hijab would be a sin, but all i know from what i read its a must like all the duties you mentioned yet the only reason women should cover their head – no matter what explanation we heard from our Islamic studies- hijab is not mentioned in quraan, but it was mentioned that women should only show their faces and hands. Sourat al Baqara.
May god Bless you and may he make me wear it in Kuwait !
I don’t know why its very hard to wear it in Kuwait !?
Just to add... said
Hadija, mashallah I really think you’re a wonderfully enlightened and beautiful soul. God bless you and may your niyyah never be corrupted despite the hardships of life because that’s what it’s really about, as you say; what’s inside the person and not what’s on the outside. For you to think the way that you do is something so precious and rare in today’s society and I wish more people looked at life in the same way that you do. A big hug and a blessing from me to you.
Qatar Cat said
Good for you.
Adel said
Well said Hadija. We live in a hypocritical male dominated Islamic society which mainly caters to the man’s world. A person should only be judged by God. Don’t let the weak repressive people get you down. Be the best kind of person you can be and only let God decide later if your deeds were good or not.
muslim said
u may want to read this:
http://submission.org/dress.html
http://submission.org/women/hijab.html
i think its very interesting.
Hadija said
Thank you Judy for your response. You will know when it is the right time. Allah guides us all, and he knows what’s best for us. So, be patient, listen to that little voice inside you, and by all means, if you get a feeling to wear the hajab, and you just can’t shake it, then it is time. And when you wear it, and you truly believe in it…it will feel so right. Good-luck, and my prayers are with you. Allah bless you.
Thank you “Just To Add”, for your support and kind words. Allah knows what is in our hearts, and he knows when we are ready, even if we don’t. Hugs to you.
Thank you “Qatar Cat”.
Hi Adel. Spot on. Being too extreme in religion will make you lose sight of the important things Allah is trying to show us. I have read many sites on the web, regading Islam, and there are so many contradictions. So, from now on, I avoid over reading the material on the sites. I prefer to read the Quaran and the suras. I am not perfect, by far; I just do the best I can…and keep trying to correct any mistakes I make.. As long as the human is trying…Allah forgives…because he knows what is in our hearts and souls. Thank you for your response.
Hadija said
Thank you Muslim. I went to the fisrt site, and it is very enlightening. When I wore the hajab, it wasn’t for any reason, except that Allah gave me a sign to wear it…a feeling. Allah gives us signs all the time, but we may not see them, because we get so caught up in our busy lives. You see, I ‘didn’t wear the hajab for 6 years, and then I recieved the sign. A few years later, my husband decided to find someone new…and I was left alone with the kids…so you see…Allah is so great. He knew that I would be left alone without a male protector, or family, so he covered me to protect me from the site of other men. Being a covered woman, and alone, is much different than being uncovered and alone. We may not see what Allah is trying to show us, until years after he has shown the things to us. Thank you for responding to my article.
Hijab Pins said
MAshallah thats really good
AyyA said
Hijab, as worn in modern day; covering face and hands, is a political emblem or identity, and women are political victims to Islamists who want to show their spread of control over their societies. It was never mandated by the Islamic scriptures; the scriptures only call for general modesty. Unfortunately women in Muslim societies take their peers words, who have taken them from political Islamists for granted without searching themselves. And as a result, those clerics have succeeded to induce fear in the societies and mislead women to believe that they are “Devils” and their bodies are “fitna” and therefore they should cover it.
moises said
fuck it;
why would you wear something dictated by superstitious ideas?
wear it only because you want to be subservient and appease patriarchal decorum.
Anonymous said
well my story is that i was living in the states for about 15 years and i came to egypt from 3 years ago so i decided to wear the hajab… now iam married and iam going to the states again with my husbend,i asked my husbend what should i do should i take it off or should i still wear it?? he told me he would be happyer if i stil had it on..but i don’t know what to do i feel that i wouldn’t be able to do anything with it on and at the same time its haram…. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO??
Shan said
Woman has to cover her head and wear loose clothes in order not to induce the male person’s sexual attention. It need not be a big black gown like the middle east women wear. It can be of any color and any model. Only condition is it should explicitly show the beauty of the woman. Likewise we have veil for men also. In fact it is more difficult one. He has to cover his body (Waist to Ankle bottom) and also lower his gaze when he meets a woman. Both these veils are to protect man and woman from the evil effects like rape, molestation etc.
what to do said
my story is that im a born and bread muslim in the UK, my parents guided me the right way and made me aware of my role to allah. i didn’t wear the hijab as i didn’t feel ready to comitte sounds bad, but i wanted to commite all the way. now married, my husban said that he wants me to wear it as hes parents wouldnt respect me as we were from 2 diffrent backgrounds. he said just wear it for 2months for me and them. i didn’t want to but i did as i thought two monthsit wouldn’t hurt. its bin a year he wont allow me to take it off as he wants people to respect me. but im misrable. i smoke and swear with it on i feel as im disrespecting alah more with it on then off. what do i do
AbuFaaiz said
Woman has to cover her head and wear loose clothes in order not to induce the male person’s sexual attention. It need not be a big black gown like the middle east women wear. It can be of any color and any model. Only condition is it should not explicitly show the beauty of the woman. Likewise we have veil for men also. In fact it is more difficult one. He has to cover his body (Waist to Ankle bottom) and also lower his gaze when he meets a woman. Both these veils are to protect man and woman from the evil effects like rape, molestation etc.
But the fact remains that any male will get induced even when he feels that he has a girl near him alone. That is the way men have been designed and made. Women needs men as a mental protection.
Suppose in a street where some rogues are waiting for teasing the girls. A twin sisters who are beautiful are coming. One girl is wearing the Islamic veil and the other a short skirt and tight T shirt. The rogues will see which girl and try to trouble which one? VEIL for women is to protect them. Not to degrade them.